Refurbished

I couldn't really remember when was the last time I really sat down and blog. It has been a while.

It has been about 4 years now and my commitment to blogging and writting has obviously shrunk. The enticement of being heard has been greatly outweighed by the loss of privacy. As contradicting as this may sound, this has indeed held me from the pen (key)board.

One of the most enjoyable part of blogging is being heard. As time goes by, more people I know personally reads and my choice of blogging material has gradually became more restricted. Not because I want to "kutuk" (backstab) anyone or anything but merely because I care (perhaps too much) about what others may think if I write this and what if I write that. And by saying that, I don't mean offensive post either. It is just the fact that human minds are capable of interpreting things their own way. I do not want to be misunderstood. I do not wished to be judged. So, I became too careful. So careful with my choice of words, and my choice of materials that I could hardly blog anymore.

On top of that is of course the privacy issue. I am afraid of 'over exposure'. It is like an ongoing, never ending contemplation of, "to blog" or "not to blog"; or "to post" or "not to post". Blogging to me is like finally got to vomit out ruminations bottled up in me. But, the same, persistent dilemma puts me into a mind fatigue state. It is like I want to freely be myself but I can't. So, I sort of vanished. Made myself disappear.

I think this has do me good. From the average maybe of 10 visitors per day, I now have maybe 1 or none per day. I know less or people follows my blog now. Perhaps some may even have forgotten. I am happy. I felt less restrain.

With so much things overflowing from the past to present, it is impossible to blog about all. Most importantly, this quarter of century has thought me some things. And I learned.

Apart from all the craps, I have decided to 'refresh' and do some refurbishing on my blog. Chucked away some stuffs. Added some. Edited some items. And "tadaa!". New look! Clean and simple :)

Hope to blog again, soon ;)